Category: success

Alphabets of Success – H

H for Happiness

“All men seek one goal: Success or Happiness.” – Aristotle

As a trainer for Management Development Programs on planning, I got into the habit of testing every task on the anvil of 5Ws and 1H, i.e. What, Why, When, Who, Where and How. Replies to these questions helps in clarifying the task, setting proper goals, developing a workable plan, tiding over constraints and executing the plan to achieve the set objectives.

While trying to put the task of ‘Success’, through this test, I was surprised that I got stuck at the question “WHY do I want to be successful?” happiness - road

There didn’t seem to be one single concrete reason for my efforts of achieving Success. The question kept lingering in my head for quite long.

Answer to this came from two opposite sides of globe.  From west came Aristotle’s prophesy “Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.” And from east came the concept of “Sat-Chit-Anand ”.

And it was eureka for me. I knew – “I want to be successful to be happy”.

Isn’t it the same for you?

Let us recall our feelings on achieving a goal or hitting a target that we have been aiming at. We feel exited, satisfied, at peace, motivated, fulfilled, …., …, …, happy…..!!!

I would say ‘the only real emotion that emanates from depths of our heart on accomplishing a goal is Happiness.’ However, I know that not many people here would subscribe to the supremacy of happiness in our desires.

So, when we see the whole world around us in stress, distress, anger, hatred, conflict, depression, aggression and in a eternal race, what are we searching for? Where are we going? What do we want to achieve?

The general reply would certainly be – Success!

How much off the mark we are in interpreting the relationship between Success and Happiness!

Let me tell you an experience from my life. In the initial years of my career, once I happened to be part of an interaction of young managers with new Managing Director of our plant. After usual ceremonial and sermon-like sessions, we were asked to put forward our concerns to the MD. One of the engineers, a junior to me by one year, raised his hand. He said that he was an IIT graduate and had topped the merit in post-employment training. However, he was posted in Coke Ovens department having horrific working conditions, whereas many lower rankers got cosy postings. He expressed his disgust at the injustice meted out to him and his feelings of having been dumped from where he could never come out.

The response given by our MD left an indelible imprint on my thought process.

The reply was, “Agreed that you are in a difficult area, possibly there has been some injustice in postings and it may be true that the job doesn’t match your talent. But, my dear friend, rest assured that if you remain as unhappy as you are today, you will continue to be in the same situation forever. It’s simple. Once you aren’t happy, you won’t perform well. When you don’t perform you get poor ratings. These poor ratings will tell adversely on your career. You’ll be branded a laggard and certainly, nobody recommends a laggard for better assignments like new technology, training programs and other opportunities……..! So, my dear friend! First be happy where you are and then see the world change!”

It wasn’t surprising that within three years, our friend got opportunities to get trained in new management tools and got exposure to the corporate world. Within ten years he quit the company and today is a renowned management consultant.

The Nobel prize winner Albert Schweitzer so rightly said that “Success is NOT the key to Happiness – Happiness is the key to Success.”Happiness-3

Many a times, we may not be celebrating some of our achievements because, they are not to the liking of others. But, if you look beyond the boundaries of social norms, you will realize that deep inside us, the feeling on reaching a goal is always of happiness. Of course, in case the task itself is not of our liking, the feeling wouldn’t be of happiness; but then, we also don’t call ourselves successful doing such a task.

So the core of our search for success is that we are all seeking happiness!

Now, the question is “How to be happy?”

Achieving happiness is not rocket science. It is a simple change in our thought process which will ensure that we are happy today, tomorrow and always.happiness - palm

  • Realise that “Happiness is being in love with yourself. You are the most important person that you have in this life.”
  • Observe that “Happiness when shared multiplies, whereas unhappiness when shared diminishes.”
  • Believe in yourself and accept that “You are the only person responsible for your present condition.”
  • Understand that “Success is getting what you love – Happiness is loving what you get.”

Mark Twain has solved the riddle of happiness with his prescription: “The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.”

So let’s be HAPPY today, here and now! Success is anyway subjective – it will follow you!

 

Alphabets of Success – C

C for Confidence

“It is confidence in our bodies, minds, and spirits that allows us to keep looking for new adventures.”—Oprah Winfrey

In a crowd of hundreds on the street, you can easily spot a few who seem to stand out while the majority appears as a scattering of nondescript human figurine. What is that makes some people look different from others, draw attention of onlookers, seem to be desirable, and appear to be an achiever….?

confidence 1

Next time when you are in a crowd, in metro, on airport, at station, in a party or in a school / college try to spot such people and find out for yourself!
These people may not be the tallest, not the most beautiful / handsomest, not the most well built, not the loudest, not wearing the costliest dress…..,……., yet they stand-out.
Try to enlist the unique characteristics of these people, the characteristics that differentiate them from commoners. Now, search for a common characteristic amongst such people! You won’t find anything common in them except – “They are confident !”

And thus the third alphabet of the language of success is “Confidence”.

To achieve your goal in life after you have set your ambitions and have belief in your capabilities you need to have confidence.
Do you remember the most sincere advice you got when you were going to take up the biggest challenge in life?
“Have confidence!”
In dictionaries, “Confidence” is defined as the feeling or belief that one can have faith or can rely upon someone or something.

When the reliance is on oneself and one’s own capabilities we get “Self-Confidence”.
People who are confident radiate strength, passion and conviction. A study published by the International Journal of Cosmetic Science showed that giving men some cologne improved their confidence……..and this improvement was enough for them to be rated as visibly more attractive in photographs. “Confidence” is the foundation for everything in life. It is our confidence, or lack of it,that directly affects how we do everything in life.

confidence 2

Our confidence is perfectly intact when we are born, but starts diminishing as we grow out of our childhood. We lose a little of it every time we make mistakes, fail, misbehave, get in trouble, feel guilty, neglect ourselves, and/or do things we are ashamed of.

Your confidence is like an unused muscle that needs to be developed. And like any muscle, it never stays the same for any period of time. It will either get stronger or weaker depending on how you use it.

When you build your confidence it’s like exercising a muscle. It relies on small, incremental improvement on a daily basis.

confidence 3

You won’t run to the gym and expect to have perfect muscles for life in just one hour. So, consistent confidence building is the only way to lasting confidence and happiness. Interestingly psychologists have found that even while dating “Confidence is more important romantically than physical attractiveness.“

It’s never too late to become confident and live the life you’ve dreamed of. It’s never late to start your journey to success.

So be blessed with immense confidence : Get it, Develop it, Practice it or Feign it, but for God’s sake BE CONFIDENT ! https://www.ted.com/talks/brittany_packnett_how_to_build_your_confidence_and_spark_it_in_others